More Apologies

Posted on Tue May 5th, 2020 @ 2:58pm by Lieutenant Jane Sinclair MD, DVM & Captain Cynthia Jackson

1,762 words; about a 9 minute read

Mission: Mission 3 - Coming Full Circle
Location: Captain's Ready Room

A few hours earlier, while on the bridge, Cindy and Jane agreed to hold a short, private meeting to talk a bit more openly. It wasn't that long ago that the doctor had learned to arrange these private discussions when she had a problem with something the Captain had said or done. Open confrontation on the bridge or over a comm line was inappropriate. But a short chat behind a closed door would solve everything.

And, of course, she felt compelled to report on her own status, and continue to seek atonement for the wrongs she had done while under Orion influence.

Jane had managed to block off some of Cindy's time at 1300. And so at the proscribed time, she chimed the door to the Captain's Ready Room.

"Come on in Jane," Cindy asked without checking who was at the door. She knew that Jane would arrive timely. When Jane arrived, she grinned at the Doctor and asked, "Would you like a seat? I know that you had something on your mind when we were discussing Vivyra on the bridge. I must say that I appreciate you waiting to take it up with me in private." She flipped some of her platinum locks behind her head and asked, "Can I get you something to drink? The food processors are not the best, so I have some things stashed away for harder conversations."

Jane flopped into the seat. She wasn’t exhausted, like last time, just drained of so much emotional energy. But she needed to get this out of the way.

She smiled and chuckled st the offer of the special drink. “Ordinarily I’d love something described as ‘stashed away,’ but I’m afraid I shouldn’t right now. With the Orions beamed away I’ve been able to take the crew off of the inoculant, but blood test after blood test still shows some of Vivyra’s pheromone in me. I’m dosing myself every few hours until my body flushes it all out.” She sighed deeply. “I need it, too. I’m under control, don’t worry, but I’ll share this with you because you’re my friend. Without the anti-Vivyra drug, I am...horny. Like, all the time. The drug dulls it. Vivyra really got under my skin.”

"Water, then?" Cindy offered. "Perhaps a cold shower," she added with a giggle. "And I'm not worried particularly about you at this moment."

Jane chuckled. “Water sounds great, thanks. But that brings me to one of the reasons I came here. I still feel awful but all the nonsense I put you and the others on board through. I’m slowly remembering some of the bad things I did. Did I really call into question how you keep discipline on the ship? Oh goodness, did I punch a guy?”

"You did those things," Cindy confirmed. "I still have not decided what to do about that," Cindy added. "But given the extraordinary circumstances, I'll likely just make a notation and call it a day."

“I appreciate that,” Jane said. “But there is one more thing. Something you said on the bridge this morning. Cindy, has your opinion of me changed that badly?”

"Am I disappointed in you?" Cindy asked. "A bit. But my overall opinion of you remains unchanged. I think you've got a beautiful heart and mean for no harm to befall any person."

“Then why did you think me possible of mutilation?” A tear ran down Jane’s cheek. “I tell you that I made arrangements to help Vivyra reintegrate into society. You compared it to declawing a cat. You remember that I’m a vet. You thought I was capable of doing horrible things to her.”

"You were talking about taking away her pheromones. Is that not partially what makes her an Orion? After all, it is normal to them. How do you or we or anyone know what is normal for her?" Cindy asked concerned. "I do not like the idea of experimenting or harming her, Jane. It does bother me."

“This is what I’m saying!” Jane exclaimed. “It isn’t experimenting. The doctors at Starbase 5 are developing a treatment to give her a chance at a normal life. They aren’t playing mad scientist to do it. And I didn’t once say anything about taking away her pheromones generally. We”re talking about eliminating this one nasty one that evil people engineered her to make.”

She took a deep breath. “Consider this, Cindy. If some nefarious person kidnapped you, and did awful things that resulted in your sweat glands generating a poison deadly to all except you, would you want me to find a cure? Or would that be immoral because developing the treatment is ‘experimenting’ and your ability to produce sweat is a normal part of Terran physiology? Because that’s what this is. Vivyra was abused by her owners, and in addition to the normal cocktail of chemicals she produces, her body is being forced to make a poison, which means she’ll never be touched by anyone not medicated or wearing gloves. And trust me, she does love to be touched.” Her face turned a deep red shade. “Imagine I told you that you could never have sex again, Cindy. A team of top medical professionals can develop a treatment, but the person in charge calls the development of that treatment ‘harmful’, without knowing anything about it.”

"It is a tricky subject, Jane. I'm not wholly sure that your analogy applies. Yes, Vivyra has been altered. But how do we know what is normal for an Orion? We make Deltans take a chastity pledge because we're allegedly too immature to handle their sexuality. Are we now trying to make a human out of an Orion? Or are we trying to domesticate a wolf into a dog? It bothers me. And it bothers me that there is no clear answer. I feel like we have some sort of duty to her. At least I do. I gave her amnesty, Jane. She is really my responsibility."

She then sighed. "As to sex, well, I think I could use another year or two break from that."

“You’re underestimating what medical science knows about Orion biochemistry,” Jane said. “It’s true the Federation hasn’t had a chance to study many Orions up close, but some of our allies have. The people of Coridan have been dealing with Orion raiders for decades and took a few prisoners over the years. It was their data that showed me this one pheromone was unnatural. My colleagues know what they’re doing. They aren’t making a human out of an Orion. They’re making a healthy Orion out of one that was abused. Your duty, and mine, is to give her a chance at happiness.”

"I hope so, Jane. I really do," Cindy replied with a tired sigh, leaning against her desk. "But what is done, is done now. We have new problems to attend to and I doubt that Wheeler will allow for us to have any slack."

“I’m sorry, but I’m not ready to move on to discuss our mission,” Jane said firmly and a bit angrily. “We may disagree on what’s best for Vivyra but it doesn’t mean you should be accusing me of mutilation and medical experimentation, on the bridge no less. And maybe you didn’t mean it that way but it’s exactly how it came out. I don’t see the difference between this and me having accused you of similarly things during the Romulan and Klingon battle. If you had concerns, you should have expressed them to me privately and not said that your vet was declawing Vivyra against her will in front of everyone.”

Cindy's eyes grew wide at Jane's anger. "I'm sorry that you think I would every think that of you. I did not mean any harm, Jane." She placed a comforting hand on Jane's shoulder. "I think you know me better than that. I'm sorry if I was careless with your emotions. I was thinking aloud and definitely concerned about how you were treating Vivyra. I'm still concerned for her. I'm concerned for you, too. That's my job. But, perhaps I could have had that conversation with you separately. Will you forgive me?" she asked blinking her eyelashes at Jane.

“Th-thank you,” Jane said. She took a breath. “I’m sorry, too. I’ve just been so emotional lately. And with everything bad I’ve done lately, I was worried about how much you might hate me now. I had nightmares of you kicking me off the ship.” She took another deep breath. “Can I have a hug please?”

"How could I hate you, Jane?" Without verbally answering, Cindy reached down and hugged Jane.

Jane melted into the hug, craving the Captain’s respect and friendship more than she knew. She held Cindy tight and and breathed deeply as she accepted her friend’s hug and warmth and body heat, her heaving chest at Jane’s head level. Her pheromone-addled body reacted before her brain could tell her to stop, and her hands began roving down to Cindy’s taut and near-perfect posterior. One stopped as it caressed and other went lower to the hem of Cindy’s skirt.

Cindy stopped the hug and backed up, causing Jane's hands to move to Cindy's side. She looked down on Jane and told her with a forced smile, "Um, Jane, I think that you might want to up your medication."

"Sorry," she replied, blushing and unable to meet Cindy's eye. "I should re-dose and probably take the afternoon off. My staff has sickbay handled. Thank you for talking with me today, Cindy."

"You're welcome, Jane," Cindy replied with a small chuckle. "I expect that the doctor will follow her own orders so that I don't have to make any." She gave Jane a small wink of encouragement.

"Your expectations are spot on," Jane said with a smile. With that, she strode out of the Ready Room and toward a turbolift. First stop: sickbay, but only to medicate and take a few extra doses for the evening. Final stop, quarters, where she needed to rest.

A flash went through her head. She had someone coming over, right? Someone special. She should use her time off to make a scrumptious dinner.

But first, a nap and a shower. And, quite frankly, until the medicine kicked in properly, some time with the shower head.

RSS Feed